The other day a friend and I were talking about weddings. Without really meaning to, we got into a long discussion about how ridiculous weddings have become. I mean seriously weddings have turned into week long “events”. Gone are the days when you can throw a basic little party in your parents’ backyard.
You have to hire a “wedding planner”, a DJ, a florist, a baker, a caterer, a photographer, a makeup artist, a hair stylist and a graphic designer just to start planning the “big day”. Before you know it, your wedding extravaganza has cost you as much as your college education and aside from a stack of expensive photo albums, you have “nothing to show for it.”
Now obviously I’m grossly over-generalizing the whole wedding weekend phenomenon, but I really do think that wedding spending has gotten out of control. Full disclosure, I’m not married, so maybe I’ll have the urge to spend $100,000 on a wedding once I get engaged, but I doubt it.
I know there are some people who manage to throw a really nice party celebration on the cheap. My sister actually got married at my parents’ home and the reception was lovely. We ate lobster (that a family friend caught on his boat-I’m originally from Maine), drank lots of beer and wine (that she bought at cost from a friend who owns a restaurant), and sang and danced to iPod playlists all night. It was a beautiful day that we’ll all remember forever.
Even being invited to a wedding these days is a pricy endeavor. If you’ve been invited to a wedding recently, you know exactly what I’m talking about:
Engagement Party. Possibly one of my favorite parts of the wedding “process.” The couple is excited to be engaged and happy to be celebrating their marriage “to be”. Typically this party is hosted and paid for by the bride and groom. It’s usually a dinner and drinks of some sort at a local restaurant.
Bridal Shower. Yet another opportunity to spend money and buy gifts – awesome. I suspect that bridal showers weren’t as labor intensive and expensive “back in the day.” Probably the shower was a nice little get together with the bride and the bride’s mom. Today, bride showers have morphed into mini-weddings. You have bring a gift from the registry and you’re “lucky” enough to be a bridesmaid, you also get to pay for the party. Super!
Bachelorette party. Thankfully, price doesn’t dictate fun. I’ve been to both fun and inexpensive bachelorette parties and expensive and boring bachelorette parties. In my experiences, the party usually involves matching shirts of some sort that say “bride” and “bridal party”, as well as male “member” themed drinking straws, pinatas, and candy necklaces. If you’re with a classier crew it involves dinner and a night of expensive clubbing and/or comedy clubs and bars. Either way, you’re not getting out of this night without dropping at least $100.
Wedding. If you’re not a member of the bridal party and the wedding is in the same city as you, you can usually keep spending to a minimum one-night hotel stay and a gift from the registry. If you have to fly in from out of town, you’re talking about 2 airline tickets (who wants to go to a wedding without a “plus one?”), 2 nights in a hotel and the meals you have to eat “around” the wedding festivities. You’ll still have to purchase a gift from the registry of course.
Post-Wedding. The day after the wedding there’s sometimes a breakfast or brunch. I’ve been to post-wedding events paid for by the bride and groom, and post-wedding events that I had to pay for. I’d need to eat breakfast either way, so I don’t really mind these events, unless the restaurant chosen is really expensive.
So what do you think? Are the costs of attending weddings getting you down?
**Disclaimer, this post is meant to be sarcastic. I have a friend who’s getting married this summer and it’s it no way directed at her, or her hubby to-be whom I love.**